Dark and Continent: Fit the Third: The Luck of 13

Categories: Travel

G’day, Rwanda is a compact bijou countryette by European standards, let alone those of Africa. Its total land area is only about 26k km2 – much of it vertical. I think that makes it smaller than Scotland. Whatever, it shouldn’t take more than about three hours to drive, as the crow flies, from any one side of the country to another. An African crow however, is a bird of a very different sort, so let’s allow a day or two if not traveling along one of the major arterial routes. Which we were, so it's only about 96km from Kigali to Ruhengeri, including a climb over a fairly respectable mountain range. The going time for the journey is an hour-and-a-halfish, which is Formula One pace by African standards. Vince is regarded as a ‘pace’ driver by the locals, both ex-pat and Rwandese, which is a little worrying. Turns out that he’s no more than mildly insane, just hates stopping. And guess who kept wanting to take photographs of the latest vista? In case you hadn’t already gathered, this is a stunningly beautiful country. Oh, and there’s a fuel crisis in most of Central Africa – the main pipeline from Mombasa, feeding S Kenya, Uganda, Tanzania, Rwanda & Burundi has fractured. So we’re into kilometre-long queues at filling stations, which makes the trip look increasingly unlikely. That’s until we discover that diesel is unaffected, and the Pajero drinks the stuff. Except that the only way to get to the diesel pumps is through the queues... So a local colleague is bribed to join the dawn chorus of the gasoline-dispossessed and turns up a while later with a full tank. And a full boot – he’s had the very good idea of also filling up a 20 litre jerrycan and sticking it in the back. That was until the top came off on the dirt road up to Vince’s. Now it’s bad enough following a smelly diesel – being sat inside a car that’s had it’s carpets saturated with the stuff promises to be a breakfast-bouncing experience. Nearly, but not quite – a housekeeper with Omo and determination is a wonderful thing – we simply had our nostrils reamed out by industrial detergent fumes. An improvement, at least. Continue reading "Dark and Continent: Fit the Third: The Luck of 13"

Dark and Continent: Fit the Second: Green, Pleasant and Landed

Categories: Travel

Bonjour tout le monde!

Mais je crois que c'etait une pays Francophone et les gens ris en plus quand l'Harris s'atttempte a parler Français. Maintenant, je retourner a l'Anglais... Gawd, that was too much like hard work – fortunately most people here speak English at some level or other, particularly the Swedes, Germans, Danes and the other entirely unsuited pale Northern types who seem to make up an unfeasibly large proportion of the population of Kigali. Which goes a long way towards describing a country that is being almost entirely (re)built with the blood money of a guilty global community, which having entirely failed to intervene and prevent the internecine slaughter of a million people and the displacement of many more, is attempting to salve its conscience by sending a million-and-one NGOs (Non-Governmental Organisations) in to do whatever it is they do: generate acronyms for the most part – UNHCR, UNESCO, ICT, WHO, FAO, ICRC, MSF, AFACOD, POPOF, AIMPO, WI... And when the Rural Agriculture pour Protection de l’Environment came to town with their be-logo’d vehicles, they were nearly lynched before Vince was able to have a word in their collective ear.

Having literally run into my DFGF colleague Dan (minor bruising only) at Nairobi airport, we were picked up at Kigali by Vince, the DFGF Field Director. Fortunately he’s just done a good deal with a Danish supplier for a brand new Mitsubishi Pajero 4WD, so rather than being rattled through the countryside in some superannuated rustbucket, we’re trolling around in smugly air-conditioned comfort. Makes a change to see the things working for a living, rather than just tackling the rigors of the Surrey school run. About half the vehicles on the road seem to be in ubiquitous UN/NGO white, and there’s clearly a hierarchy of machismo going on – from the Danish human rights bods in their cheap Toyota pick-ups (really bad haircuts, guys...), to the UNHCR and MSF with their Landcruisers bristling with satcomms aerials, wombat bars (I haven’t the heart to tell them...) and river-crossing gear. As in Surrey, these huge vehicles are suspiciously clean and unscarred. Scurrilous gossip has it that most of the fighting in town is now between the dozen or so competing and frantically self-justifying NGOs that descend like harpies on anything vaguely resembling a cause. Continue reading "Dark and Continent: Fit the Second: Green, Pleasant and Landed"

Dark and Continent: Fit the First: Ugandan Discussions

Categories: Travel

So this is it: It's a cold, wet Wednesday in January and I've packed my bag, having forcibly reminded myself not to pack thermals and fleeces, but go large on t-shirts, sun screen and Lomotil. And as long as I haven't mixed a random cat into it, I'm ready to go – a month in East and Central Africa beckons, so I reckon I'll just have to grin'n'bear it.

For those I haven't already bored to oblivion (hello, anyone out there?), the theory is that I'm going to do information agey things for the Dian Fossey Gorilla Fund, to take a few pics and – lest I could forget – go play the very amateur Attenborough with some mountain gorillas. For the primate pedants amongst us, that's Gorilla gorilla berengei – the 600-strong remnant population of the Mountain Gorilla, the centenary of whose discovery by Europeans was commemorated last year. That's commemorated rather than celebrated, given that Capt. Rupert Berenger's approach to animal identification was very much of its time – he cheerfully shot a couple of them and had them dragged home for investigation over a cuppa. We don't do that any more – I hope.

First stop is Kampala for a few days, via Nairobi: to find out about the rollout of various telecoms services across Uganda and neighbouring states – the gorillas, bless 'em, hang around on the borderland between S Uganda, Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo (Zaire), so anything that improves comms between different DFGF offices, field staff when mobile, the London HQ and the rest of the world can only be a good thing. It does look like Bwindi might get DSL before Hindhead. Amazing coincidence number 1: I discover that my friend Isabel is going to be out in Kampala on the same dates, running a workshop for local communications companies and regulators – everyone I need to talk to in one room at exactly the right time. And someone to go see the Kampala nightlife with. Which we did – I think – everything did get a little hazy...

Continue reading "Dark and Continent: Fit the First: Ugandan Discussions"

Dark and Continent: Introduction

Categories: Travel

A series of illuminated e-mail epistles delivered to the philistines during the course of wandering and working around Central and East Africa, January and February 2003. To be taken, for the most part, lightly. In the event of any digression between observed reality and the contents, please allow reality the final word.

The author takes no responsibility for the consequences should any person rely on this as any form of guide to travel or behaviour in the region, up to and including the contraction of embarrassing diseases, famine, war, hangover, imprisonment and/or deportation.